Before my son falls asleep, we have a ritual of asking each other 3 questions.
Sometimes these questions are about feelings, experiences or people, and they usually lead on to conversations about life. They are a great way for us to stay connected and check in at the end of the day.
One night we were talking about school, and he told me that he had to draw himself and then choose one word that he felt suited him. He chose BRAVE.
I think he chose exceptionally well as he embodies braveness in his heart and soul. We ended up choosing 3 words for him (brave, funny and loyal), 3 words for me (loving, helpful and brave) and 3 words for Daddy (trustworthy, teacher and caring). We are doing his brothers and sister another night. He chose the words and told me why, and by the time I walked out his room, I was not only a teary mess but I was so proud of his ability to articulate his experiences of his family to me.
It got me thinking, so this is how my kid sees me: as someone who is loving, helpful and brave.
If I were to pick 3 words for myself, I doubt I would be so kind, or at least not right away.
Why is it that others can always see the best in us, whilst we give ourselves a hard time?
I encourage my children to be kind, to others and to themselves. When they say things like “I’m not smart/strong/brave enough to do that”, we talk about it and go through ways were the obstacle can be done. We encourage happy words and never use words like ‘stupid’ or ‘ugly’ in the house.
Be kind and brave.
Not just to others, and not just to those you know.
Be kind to yourself.
Be kind to strangers.
Be kind to those who love you most.
It is so simple even my 6 year old gets it…